I Am

Take comfort in the pain
Of knowing who you are
For I am ever with you
You'll never be too far

From the place you met me
And felt my love flow in
And knew for just a moment
The peace that lies within

Grant your life it's shadow
The veil that speaks in tears
The fragile shell that seems so real
As you move through it's fears

I gave you the vision
To see beyond that veil
To feel the truth within each soul
My wisdom cannot fail

Your heart is mine for giving
And never theirs to take
So learn to love without regret
That Love, I'll not forsake.


Feb 3, 2013

Room to Room

Room to room
It comes with me
To the party
I give praise
For very good beef brisket
You can pay a lot
When it's not on sale
You should wait for Labor Day
To buy that artsy-craftsy furniture
Ikea simply will not do
Without a big parking lot
You'll never find a space close in
Unless you get there early
You'll miss the birds singing to the sunrise
To begin a new day
Is a singular joy.

Scratch the Pain

Hootie scratched the pain today
I'd follwed the Crowes on down
It's all good stuff, they like to say
If you've been there, well, you might just drown

I didn't know I'd remember this
Or if I did what would I feel
But down below the surface it's
Just sixteen shades too fucking real

I watched and waited just like that
Dug my heels through the mud and pain
Held on so hard it nearly broke my back
Left me to die in my own hard rain

But somehow you'd watched over me
Though you I'd never passed a glance
And you'd seen fit to set me free
And grant me one redeeming chance

So does she cry I'll never know
She Left while I was still in healing
When angels called her out she'd go
And leave me to my empty feeling

But now I have to try again
And trust where hope had died alone
Wiser now, of course, but pain
Is guaranteed if I would grow

So help me now avoid the choice
That brings the darkness to my fear
And let me hear the peaceful voice
That you've ordained to grow in here

If trust means pain then pain I will
For without trust the dark will grow
And I know love awaits me still
But who and when I cannot know

Scratch the pain, and I will grow
Scratch this pain, and let me go


Black Crowes: She Talks To Angels...
Hootie and the Blowfish: Let Her Cry...

Exploring Southern CA - In My Own Little Way

Greetings All

Been here in Arcadia/Pasadena (Live/Work) for just over a month, so high time it was last weekend that I did a little exploring with a camera (as I'd promised you die-hard readers I would). What I decided would be an easy and photogenic trip by bus/foot turned out to be not so much the former, but very much the latter - The Huntington Library, Art Collection, and Botanical Gardens in San Marino (just South of Pasadena). Herewith is the photographic evidence that "I've been there and done that!"

Being ever too trustful of Google Maps, I set out on the Metro 79, which actually starts a couple blocks from my Extended Stay abode, and runs all the way (through several communities) to downtown L.A. (that's a future adventure). Hopping off at Huntington Blvd. (an inter-city route I take all the time from Arcadia) and San Marino Ave, I was presented with what has to be the most "ghetto fabulous" bus stop I've ever seen (and I've seen a lot of 'em!):

Yes, Virginia, that's really the bus stop - it has cozy benches inside, and there's positively no other excuse for it to be where it is.

This should be a clue (if I hadn't already suspected), that I was NOT entering a "low rent" (or even middle-class) district. In recent times I've learned that I can fit in anywhere - from a homeless shelter to the Ritz (whether or not anybody else - say, a security guard - agrees) so long as I behave appropriately to the venue. So no silly posh bus stop is going to daunt this explorer!

What follows is a photo-montage of my expedition up (and I do mean UP - all the way - though only at a mild grade) San Marino Ave, where Google Maps promised me (heh) I'd find the entrance to The Huntington about 1 mile North. I include a few look-backs at the major intersections (including Huntington & San Marino). The picture names are actually short captions (you can see them by hovering the mouse on most browsers), though I'll comment where appropriate. About half of my photos are from the walk BEFORE I got to The Huntington - you'll likely understand why when you see them - I need some friends in THIS neighborhood, oh yes, I do.

Above is actually somebody's house (like many near it) whom I'd forgive of many a sin were they to befriend me for a weekend. :)

Corner lots are always so under-rated. :)

Gosh I just can't decide - could you show me something in a ranch style?

Ok, I see the sign! But Google Maps said a different street! Adventure-bound, I continued on up San Marino...

Wow, this looks adventurous - I wonder where it ends up?

Oh, I see. :)

Right about here, I saw California Street (Pasadena!) was ahead of me - I'd I'm already well-enough versed in the area to know I'm way too far North! Ok, ladies, you win. :)

My camera battery was starting to spook me, so I laid off the photos while I was headed back down to the sign...

And followed it here.

One thing noteworthy about this adventure is that in the 3-4 hours I spent at this place, I barely scratched the surface - it's HUGE! I managed to see maybe 1/10 of it, if that, and the only building I went into for about 1/2 hour was the Huntington Art Gallery (one of several). This is definitely one of those "must go back" venues, and I plan to!

This is the Huntington Art Gallery, full of large paintings and sculptures from the periods the Huntingtons collected. This building was actually their residence, and many rooms include furniture/settings from the Huntingtons' lifestyle. I didn't get pictures inside, as a flash isn't allowed (they have pretty high security, and a black-tie "host" in every room), and I didn't feel like fiddling with the low-light settings on my camera with the spooky battery.

This is the entrance to the Children’s Garden, a very serene place I think I'll eat my lunch at next time. :)

Perfect spot for a bag lunch - I saw one of the staff doing that (elsewhere).

One of many signs directing visitors around the multi-acre site. They also give you a pretty good 3d style map in their visitor handout.

The North Vista Lawn - I wonder what these guys do at night; maybe I don't want to know. :)

This is the greenhouse and botanical display that I didn't have time to go in. Betting it's incredible, so it'll be on my list when I go back.

This is (I believe) looking toward the Chinese Tea Garden, where I took most of my pics to follow.

      This is one entrance to another garden (can't remember which), very well guarded. :)

This is the Zen (Japanese) garden, which is under expansion/renovation at picture time (couldn't enter). I'm looking through a chain-link fence at the construction site, which to me is pretty anyway, but will no doubt get prettier. Blast those dad-gum aliens who landed their star-cruiser right next to me as I was taking the photo (that's their landing strut you see in the foreground). :)

I also blame the aliens for my camera battery wimping out on me right about then - so I knew it was time to bug out (anyway) and plan my future return. Here are a few previously taken "parting shots"...

Latest from Arcadia!

Saturday, 9/10/2011 - Arcadia, CA

Time I updated all those interested. It's been quite the couple weeks since I landed (well, rolled, really) down here in the Pasadena area. Sorry no photo updates as I write this - I still plan to get myself out as a tourist, and will bring the trusty digital when I do.

For those who read my last post, I'm still at an extended stay hotel in Arcadia (a few miles East of Pasadena, where I'm working). I've spent a lot of my free time in the last couple weeks exploring the local shopping geography while picking up (with a space-and-weight-critical eye) a lot of little things that make this a pretty functional home base. Much of it has to do with kitchen operations, so I don't have to eat out. In fact, I've made myself quite comfortable here. What with the good location (easy transit connections) and my own light living style (I occupied a bedroom at my sister's home for over a year - so I'm good at living small), I like this place so much I'm actually somewhat put off from leaving in any hurry - still want more permanent digs, but I can definitely take my time about it with no stress. The price per month is the same as I'd be paying for any reasonable apartment that met my transit access requirements.

The job is also most excellent (so far, anyway) - even though at this writing, after two weeks on, I have none of: cubicle, computer, phone of my own. I'm sharing a cube (a large one, fortunately) with the guy I'm essentially replacing while automating much of his current workload - he's a former contract worker like me who got hired permanent so he's ready for bigger things, but has a HUGE workload to get off his plate - and that's where I come in, to both assist directly and streamline that work. Challenging, but fun, and I'm happy (aside from being temporarily "homeless" at my job) with the environment and the people.

They are starting up a new program where they intend to have about half their workforce (in this office) telecommute 2 or 3 days a week and switch off office days to share cubes - space is that tight. I'll almost certainly be one of those after a 60 day "get acquainted with the office" wait. If I'm still in the extended stay place when that happens, that's a bit of a wrinkle, as the Internet here (unsurprisingly) isn't likely fast enough to fill that bill - if I stayed here I'd have to con the hotel into letting me get a faster setup in my room - not sure that would fly, but hopefully I can get a better arrangement before then.

Most of my social life so far is through my recovery (and other) connections both up there (aka some of you readers) and those I'm quite purposely making down here. That's going very well also, so I usually have pretty full days, even on weekends, between that and running the business of living in general. It's actually rare that I have the time I'm using now to write, and that, for me, is a good thing. :)

So keep reading, and by all means comment with your thoughts & questions!

Pasadena/Arcadia - The First 24

Greetings Folks,

So many of you to update, much easier for me to write once here and post the link.

As some of you know, after a long employment hiatus (since 3/31/2011), I've secured a new contract job in Pasadena - I start this Monday, 8/29/11.

Quite the relocation from Richmond to Pasadena, and one fraught with difficulties due to financial status/background - so while I'm working through it, in order to work, so I can work through working it out :), I've taken up temporary residence at an extended stay hotel in Arcadia (a few miles East of Pasadena - easy bus ride). I landed here late yesterday afternoon, so this post marks about 24 hours.

As part of my own initiation (complete neophyte) to the L.A. area, I've promised myself to go scouting and take lots of pictures, and in that spirit, I'm starting close to "home" - here are some pics of the actual hotel and room I'm calling my "residence" for at least a few weeks while I look for more permanent digs.

This is a view of the hotel from its own parking lot - early morning (about 7:00) - note the sun is up on the mountains to the North (I believe the "San Gabriel" range) in the background. It's also about 75 degrees F, by the way - predicted high today 98:

Here's a pic of the same hotel right just before dawn (too lazy right now to crop or balance these, BTW):

Here we are walking into my room's front (only) door:

Here's a view of the kitchenette from the middle of the room - full size fridge! Yay! Mini-microwave and 2 burner stove, sink, and counter space not bad for a tiny studio. The toaster & coffee maker are both provided, as are enough plates, bowls, cups and flatware for exactly 2 people:

This is looking from the middle of the room toward the bath (kitchen out of view to the left). Nice little desk but no drawers (fortunately there's an ample chest of drawers you'll see further on):

Mid-room again looking toward the corner opposite the kitchenette - the curtained window provides a stunning view of the parking lot (meh). Note the armchair and divan (or whatever Martha Stuart calls those) - quite comfy, and for someone who is capable of sleeping on trains, and even buses, a probable occasional alternative to the bed:

Here's a shot of the clothing rack area opposite corner from the bath - looking along the wall (left) that has the window. One item worth noting is the air conditioner in the foreground - a truly essential piece of equipment here. Also notice the chest with the TV (sadly) BOLTED to it - I'd remove it and stick it in a corner out of the way otherwise. They do have "Showtime", so maybe I'll watch a movie sometime (or maybe not). They do allow pets here, but you have to register them and they can't be too big - I don't think my fuzzy snake (I could never think of a good name for him - want to help?), Sparkle, my pony on the TV, or Blue (the little eh "pink" dog on the right below Sparkle - nobody believes me - he got washed!) count. I'll be getting more clothes (and hangers!!!) in a UPS box promised Monday:

Here's a better shot of the chest, with Sparkle and Blue - also a small table & chair (kitchenette on the right) where I put my laptop and - oh look - it's my fuzzy snake coiled up there! Well, what can we expect from a snake?:

Here's my actual view (see my stylish slippers?) of the whole arrangement from the cushy chair by the window. I didn't take any pics in the bath, as it's not very exciting - it does does have all the essentials, including a tub/shower combo, and pretty roomy full-wall vanity.

That's it - those are my digs for now, anyway. I did check the most important feature the moment I arrived here - the WiFi (which is free) - not super fast, but faster than some, and seems reliable so far. Biggest deal is Skype likes it so I can make phone calls with my Bluetooth and be dirt cheap. :)

The most major event today (Saturday) was tackling my first grocery shopping expedition (remember, I don't drive). I asked the front desk where the nearest big grocery chain store was, and they gave me some Google map directions (driving, of course) - I got the address off that and Googled it myself for BUS directions, and found the already familiar 187 goes straight there (well, as straight as buses go) - so I grabbed my traveling satchel (you can see it on the floor in the clothing area above) and my rather lengthy list of bare bones essentials for a week of living in and packing a lunch to work, and headed for the bus stop. It was already quite warm at about 9:00, and quite the task to keep my weight and space count down so I could carry that thing back! I managed it though, and just managed to miss the first bus back, so had to wait 1/2 hour in the (ahem) nice warm sunshine (I'd say it was 90F or better), for the very happily air-conditioned bus. After a very warm walk home from the bus I began my recuperation. :)

I'll try to post more pics of the area as I get them. I'm told these high temps are "rare" for this (Pasadena) area, so if it cools off, I'll definitely be out more.